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Greg [no subject] Tue 12th Dec 2000, 15:03 link
OK, here's some fun... each day (in theory!) I'm going to post our Quotes of the Day, compiled from the damn silly things people say in my office. Here's a little catch-up, from the start.

  • "It’s okay. I have a Camel, and a Llama, and a Cheetah." – Greg 16/11/00
  • "That is not good, $DEITY dammit!" – Greg 16/11/00
  • "He’s not bent, he’s bisexual" – Greg (having a bad day) 16/11/00
  • "It’s not like I’m going to let it fizz up everywhere… [fizzzzzz]" – Sam 16/11/00
  • "Stop Hitting me with your long sticky thing" Adam (scared) 16/11/00
  • "I actually have a book of quotes" – Ben 17/11/00
  • "He prefers palms to naked women" – Greg (about Danny) 17/11/00
  • "No offence Adam, it is quite a nice anus" – Ben 17/11/00
  • "She’s trying to get into my trousers a thread at a time" – Adam (about Xanthe) 17/11/00
  • "It’s not coming out Gweg!" – Adam 17/11/00
  • "Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha" – Greg (all the time)
  • "I’d be walking like John Wayne for the next three weeks!" – Xanthe 20/11/00
  • "Terence…?" "Oh, yes please Greg!" – Greg/Terry 21/11/00
  • "Ooh, can I have some red ones?" – Adam 21/11/00
  • "I prefer pads to nipples…" – Adam 21/11/00
  • "Tell him, he won’t give me one!" – Sam 21/11/00
  • "They’re very, very small…" – Xanthe 21/11/00
  • "Adam, why was your hand there?" "I was going to… erm, no." – Greg/Adam 22/11/00
  • "I am a man, who is trying to get behind Terry" – Ben 22/11/00
  • "Shut up, or I will nerf you." – Greg 22/11/00
  • "Stop it, that tickles." – Xanthe 22/11/00
  • "Just for the record, Xanthe is poking Ben." – Carl 22/11/00
  • "It was Carl. He opened his anus." – Greg 22/11/00
  • "No it’s not, it’s a todger." – Ben 22/11/00
  • "It’s alright, Nicola’s got lots of free condoms." – Xanthe 22/11/00
  • "I’ll administer the pumping action to Phil." – Adam 22/11/00
  • "So what are they doing pumping each other’s weapons?" – Gianni 22/11/00
  • "I didn’t want to handle his Smarties" – Adam 23/11/00
  • "Ergh, he just tried to lick me!" – Adam 23/11/00
  • "Just get your nerf out, give her a good nerfing…" – Adam 23/11/00
  • "I’ve just had a flashback of spanking Psycho Peter’s ass with a bamboo cane!" – Tracey 23/11/00
  • "Ooh ooh Ben, ooh ooh!" – Adam 24/11/00
  • "What the f**k is going on in this weird hell-hole" – Ben (to himself) 24/11/00
  • "I’ve also just got my hands on Ian’s balls…" – Adam 24/11/00
  • "Fuck me" "His balls have dropped" "Get off my feet" "Actually, Ian’s balls have dropped" – Adam / Greg / Xanthe / Adam 24/11/00
  • "Die server Die hahaha.… Oh errrm, well, ah, didn’t mean to do that erm bye..." – Danny 24/11/00
  • "He’s got that massive gun that shoots things at people…" – Customer 27/11/00
  • "There’s some very nice year seve-uhn-elevens… doh" – Greg 29/11/00
  • "Ow, that’s my arse, get off!" – Xanthe (not her usual words!) 29/11/00
  • "Oh god, I thought it said ‘aroused the clock’, it’s ‘around the clock’!" – Xanthe 29/11/00
  • "I had ‘around’ and ‘used’ and got aroused" – Xanthe 29/11/00
  • "I can’t cross my legs; they’re always wide open!" – Adam 29/11/2000
  • "You look taller when you are sat down" –Tracey (about Brett) 29/11/00
  • "I don’t know where it comes out but it comes out" – Adam 29/11/00
  • "Allegedly…" "Nah, she wasn’t that drunk!" – Greg/Adam 29/11/00
  • "Ohhh you’ve got a weird tool" "Greg pull it out……" – Adam / Ben 30/11/00
  • "I can provide you with children" – Terry (to Adam) 4/12/00
  • "I’ll lend you a bootdisk if you’ll come and show me something" – Terry (again to Adam) 4/12/00
  • "In’t he mean, not giving me one?" "I did give you one!" – Reshma/Adam 4/12/00
  • "I can’t find my little one, so I’m using my big one…" – Adam 4/12/00
  • "Whose is that one?" – Bob 5/12/00
  • "If you want to swallow something that size…" – Xanthe (to Terry) 5/12/00
  • "That’s the wrong bit, don’t pull that bit…" – Xanthe & Adam 5/12/00
  • "Friggin’ ‘Ell! That’s a gun and a half…" – Some fat dood wearing adidas 6/12/00
  • "Hello Help oh shit that’s the mouse…" – Adam 6/12/00
  • "I’m old for my age!" – Martin 6/12/00
  • "Scan me!!" – Martin 6/12/00
  • "Look at him, playing with his fairy ends…" – Martin (about Jose) 6/12/00
  • "We go in the bottom entrance and go up" – Martin 6/12/00
  • "It does really funny things, do you want to play?" – Sam 7/12/00
  • "I is arse-bandit, aight!" – Danny 7/12/00
  • "I do apologise for the smell emanating out of my bottom." "Talking out your arse again, Danny?" "Spot on, mate." – Danny / Adam / Danny 8/12/00
  • "Service with tits …… ooops sorry I meant smile" – Danny 8/12/00
  • "Oh bother," said Pooh, as he hid the mangled remains of Piglet’s corpse.
  • "Gonad man, gonad man. Can’t get any but he thinks he can…" – Greg, singing 12/12/00
  • "I lift my leg and catch things!" – Xanthe 12/12/00
  • "That’s good, you’re supposed to grow when I do that! Stupid thing!" – Xanthe 12/12/00
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